Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Wanting More

Seems lately I've been hungry. Seriously hungry. I could pretend I wasn't talking about food...but that would be a complete lie....but that's for another blog post....today I'm talking about life.

I'm teaching a 13 week ladies class at church right now and if there is one thing that gets me wanting more its when I dive into God's Word and see all the things that I don't know or don't understand (not that I ever will understand it all). It gets me hungry to feast off the many delicacies of the Bible. It also leaves me wanting more for my life in general. Not in a dissatisfied sort of way...but a longing for all the things that God wants to give me. Hopefully you know He has a very generous nature. His desire to give us good and perfect gifts is huge. It's me that has a way of bulking up on the carbs and fat of this world until I don't even give a conscious effort to fill up on the substance of Him. I long for that. I want more.

Another thing I want more of is discipline. Not just physically, but in every area of my life. I've noticed lately that I feel out of control when things around me are not organized or at least a resemblance of order. I don't like that feeling. But do I like doing the necessary things it takes to keep things orderly? Not really....that takes discipline...with my time, my efforts, my energy. UGH....it might mean working harder or later or more diligently in my home so that things are more functional. That is something I want...but do I want to do the work to make it happen? Couldn't someone just send the cleaning fairy and the laundry maid?

I want more for my kids. I want them to know more about God's love for them. His trustworthiness. Their worth in Him, His provision. I want their faith to be rooted in grace. I want them to love His Word and memorize it and read it and value its wisdom above all other. I want more for them.

The desires of my heart were first placed there by God himself so they don't surprise Him at all. Sometimes I wonder if He doesn't look down and say, "So you're finally ready for more? I've been waiting. Hold on!"

I'm ready Lord. No more mediocre, self sufficience. No more proud ugly know it all attitude.

I want more.

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