Monday, January 11, 2010

For those who've wondered...AM I DOING THIS RIGHT?

As a mom, as each new year dawns, I have a special talk with goes something like this:

Self: How's it going with the kids? Are they healthy? Growing? Happy? Learning? Exploring?
Where do we need to re-strategize? What changes need to be made? Where do they need to be taught more? Disciplined more? Guided more? Where are they struggling spiritually? What can you do to help?
Have you ever been there? Wondering if you're doing this parenting thing right or not? Well, I will testify that I make my fair share of mistakes, but there have been a few things that I have learned along the way, or that others learned and passed on to me, that have helped me.

Here are just a few:

1. Put my husband first.
2. Hug and Kiss my husband in front of my kids (they laugh and snicker...but it's good and healthy for them to see us affectionate towards each other)
3. Divide and conquer. Thankfully Bruce is an excellent father and is more than willing to help with the kids...this has included our nightly rotation with the kids when they were younger . We alternated nights to care for the babies when they were still waking in the middle of the night. That ensured we each got a good nights sleep at least every other night of the week. And a good nights sleep goes a long way in a marriage...and in parenting.
4. Pray with and for your kids...even when they are babies.
5.Don't over schedule- for yourself or the kids.
6. Make sure that you are excited about the things of the Lord. That will spill out to your kids.
7. Talk about spiritual things with your kids. Let them see you living your faith out every day.
8. There are plenty of ways to correct your children. Spanking is only one of them.
9. Don't start allowing your kids to do, wear or act one way when they are 2 years old and then change the rules when they are 13. You'll save yourself a ton of heartache.
10. Don't let media have a greater influence on your kids than you. Monitor TV, music and literature. Talk with your kids about pop-culture and explain appropriate and inappropriate behavior.

Without exception, my own private prayer life has been strengthened by being a parent. We place expectations on ourselves and our children that are sometimes unreasonable. Seeking God's face  and searching for His plan for our family are key in any parenting plan. Thankfully the Lord gives us plenty of scriptures to dive into regarding his plan for the family.

See Deuteronomy 4:9-10, Deuteronomy 6:6-9, Deuteronomy 11:18-19, Proverbs 13:24, Proverbs 19:18, Proverbs 22:6, Proverbs 22:15, Proverbs 23:13-14 , Proverbs 29:15 , Proverbs 29:17 , Ephesians 6:4, Colossians 3:21.

What are you doing right? Share your thoughts- I'd love to hear about them!

1 comment:

F. Deaton said...

Ok, freak out city over here...I was thinking about this VERY SAME THING earlier this evening! I was thinking about how as a married mom, I wonder that, and how single moms probably wonder even more. It also came up last night as I was working on MC stuff.

One thing I *believe* I am good at remembering to do-is praising my kids and telling them they are such good helpers, and how God likes it when they help,etc.

I have to purpose to talk about how God is in every little,bitty part of our lives. My desire is that my children (and myself) be consumed with the Lord and his goodness.