Friday, February 13, 2015

What My True Love Looks Like


I hardly ever talk about my marriage relationship. Pretty sure I don't want to gag anyone with my bragging on how great Bruce is....but, whatever, it's Valentines Day and it seems like maybe you could cut me a little slack or take an Imodium if you feel nauseated...so here goes!

True love...

1. True love realizes that I am not perfect and so instead of pointing out and keeping track of my mistakes...he manages to help me laugh at myself and find humor in the everyday.

2. True love realizes that I know nothing about cars and so instead of even asking me to register it, change the oil in it, change the wiper fluid in it, or even clean it out....He takes care of it. About all I do is gas it up....and most of the time I don't do that...he does.

3. True love helps with house work because I help with church work. We both feel equally called to home and church. I LOVE that about Him.

4. True love is invested in our kids. He spends time with them having fun, learning and working. I am not training them alone.

5. True love establishes boundaries. He says "no" when He needs to and "yes" when he can.

6. True love sets a good example. I learn from him daily. He's forgiving and energizing and loving....all things that sometimes don't come easy for an insecure skeptic.

7. True love doesn't always have to be right. Even when He is. He can back off, down or turn around in matters of trivial pursuit.

8. True love irons his own clothes...and everyone else's in the family-- after I match them all up.

9. True love doesn't buy me flowers....because he knows I'd rather have his time....building raised beds outside for fresh flowers and veggies.

10. True love loves God more than me. And I'm good with that...because by loving His father more he can love me more.

Sometimes when we are young we forget to look for all the lovely ways our beloved loves us. For me...I spent many Valentines Days disappointed that I didn't get what someone else got, or I didn't get to go to a fancy smancy restaurant or on a trip. And then I started keeping track of my gratitudes...my gifts and then I realized....Bruce loves me in our own way....Our lives are busy and when he lessens my load....He's taking care of me...When he is training our kids....He's taking care of our earthly investment that God gave us....When He backs off in an argument....He's saying...he loves me enough to humble himself....When He laughs with me....He reminds me that life is about enjoying all these moments...not just the perfect ones.

And since our love is messy....I'm thankful for every imperfect moment that we share.

So today or tomorrow or whenever you celebrate....remember it's about all the moments....not just the ones that happen on February 14.

For us....we are headed to the funeral home....with our kids to say goodbye to a man I've never met...but love because of what his investment with his family has given the world....A man who raised and invested in a son, who raised and invested in his two sons, that are investing their lives in the ministries of our church here and in a third world country. That's some true love worth celebrating!

See...true love never really dies.

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