Monday, October 10, 2011

When You Don't Know Why

Sometimes you don't know why God allows things to happen. Sometimes it's your fault. Sometimes it's not. Sometimes it hurts immediately. Sometimes it hurts later. Sometimes it never hurts. Sometimes it's unbearable.

So, I'm going to be very transparent...I may lose some "friends". When we left the last church we worked in, I was grieving. Grieving the loss of friends...sweet people who I had grown to love. I was grieving the loss of ministry. Wondering why God called us to work at a begin a task and then to be incapable of finishing it (in our eyes). I wondered if we would ever be ready to really serve, worship, love again. 

But God heals hearts and wounds and fixes broken things. He mends the heart strings. He binds the brokenhearted and gives grace...forgiveness...all the things that I needed. 

So...through social media I've kept up with many of our friends from past ministries. And today...there was a posted by the current pastor of the church we left. They recently had a baptism service with MANY baptized. As I watched the video there were the faces of many who we had the opportunity to love on while we were there. They were getting baptized or their children were...some entire families where immersed in the water that day. And it touched me. In a stirring way...the kind where tears fall unashamed down your face. 

I was so excited and humbled and blessed and reminded. Reminded that sometimes we won't always understand why things happen the way they do. Sometimes we will never know why God allows things...even hurts or disappointments or sickness or death. BUT He does have a purpose a plan. We just have to do our part. 

While I'm still unclear what "our part" always is....I do know this 'Some plant, Some water....but God gets the increase". You never know what part you might play in someone embracing grace. God does all the REAL work. We just plant and water....I'm thankful for the chance to get to see that today. I'm thankful for the work of ministry that continues there...leading others to Jesus....teaching and preaching His word and encouraging the saints. What a beautiful body.


Christi said...

Thank you for sharing your heart and this beautiful reminder that we may not always understand, but God has an ultimate plan He is using for His ministry.

The Caldwells said...

Something I am dealing with the last few months.