Returning to the Call

It's been 7 months almost to the date. 

Bruce resigned a church that we loved with all our hearts. And I thought I couldn't breath. 

I was 16, a scrawny teenage girl, attending youth camp in Tennessee, when I gave my life to Jesus to do whatever He wanted. I already knew....I wanted to be a pastor's wife. I wanted to wear the pretty clothes my childhood pastor's wife wore, I wanted to sing like her, I wanted to walk proudly beside my husband and I wanted to pray for people at the altar. That's what I thought her life was all about.

Fast forward less than 10 years down the road and I was traveling with Bruce to begin living the dream....our first church pastorate...13 people and a tiny white building with a little yellow parsonage in the back. I was in heaven. Since then, 20 plus years have passed. 2 other churches and the 16 year old girl with dreams of ministry is nearing 46 and in the last 7 months has dealt with the realities of ministry. Ministry is hard...but God is faithful to walk every single step with me. 

Tomorrow we move to a new town. New church. New faces. New ministry. I feel like a junior high student....nervous, excited and a little clumsy. But God has this. He has carried me through the darkest time of my life and brought me out to walk in truth. And the truth is, God has called us. God wasn't through with us. God, in His sovereignty, has worked what I thought was tragedy into something beautiful. God has protected my family. My children's faith has grown and we have been humbled by the things the Lord has allowed us to experience. He has been better than good to us. 

I could dwell on the bad...cause there's been some.

I could meditate on the disappointments...cause there's been some.

I could count my losses...but honestly I can't count that high. 

It has been painful.

But in every surrendered situation...God can bring beauty from ashes. And He has done that...the masterpiece maker has been busy. 

Thanks be to God for calling a scrawny 16 year old girl. 

PS...ministry is way more than pretty clothes and walking with your pastor husband and praying with people at the altar. Mrs. Jackson made it look so easy....yet, I am sure she struggled with everything I have. What grace she walked in!